Nit Wits #38: Turnkey

Nit Wits #38: Turnkey Posted Nov-8-2007
Mmmmmm.... Thanksgiving Day Turnkey Dinner

FREE BONUS FUN: Turnkey Coloring Page

Nit Wits #38 ("Turnkey") was a comic hatched after the conception of two ideas and one chronic typing mishap:

• The merging of two ideas: The Thanksgiving holiday crossed with a "fully equipped; ready to go into operation" multi-level marketing (MLM) business venture.

• The typing mishap: My repetitive habit of typing "turnkey" when I was trying to type "turkey". See, this is what happens when you thrive on wordplay. Your perspective changes, and everything is fodder for fun.

• Plus one more thing I just thought of: This is not directed at the "good" MLM ventures out there. But for the questionable ones, I just realized the irony of the jive turkey talkin' spokes-turkey up there on the TV screen trying to sell the "Best MLM opportunity!" (Who you callin' turkey? The person selling or the person buying? Good question!)

• Speaking of Turkey Television: Remember that show on Nickelodeon in the early- to mid-80s? I miss that!

Now the real question is this: what kind of MLM scheme could a turkey possibly be trying to shell out to viewers? Let's brainstorm:

• A fowl-weather line of clothing and accessories (such as "A gaggle of rain goulashes galoshes").

• A hot line of lingerie called "Feathers & Fluff".

• A linguistic software that translates gobbledygook into English.

• An underground time-share condo colony operating during November and December to hide turkeys from becoming Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner.

• A restaurant franchise chain for the carb-conscious named Turkey 'n' Tea."

Uh oh. It looks like I've used up my allotment of article bullets, so I guess I'll sign off with (what else?) "Stick a fork into me because I'm done!" •

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© 2007 Chris Dunmire www.chrisdunmire.com. All rights reserved.