A Couple of Bad Apples: Real Life Nit Wits

"A Couple of Bad Apples" Posted Jan-16-2007
Bad Seed Fruit Jokes
This is a true story that happened on the second day of my two-week Arizona trip while staying with my parents. My mom had several apples lying around her kitchen counters that looked like they belonged in a compost heap. One had a huge gash in it and another was becoming wrinkly due to dehydration. To my horror, I think she was still planning on eating them!

Well, one day while I was alone in the house looking at the sorry apples, a Nit Wits-esque inspiration struck. I couldn’t pass up a saucy opportunity to poke fun at my mom’s fruitgality.

Grinning ear-to-ear, I positioned two of the apples on top of the middle of the stove and grabbed a piece of paper in which I made two dialogue balloons that said “Let’s rob a bank!” and “No, let’s go shake some orange trees!” And, I wrote the most tongue-in-cheek caption I could think of: “A couple of bad apples.”

I taped the dialogue balloons to the apples and left them sitting for my parents to see when they arrived home. When they did, the apple scene got a few chuckles. Butter than nothing I thought to myself.

My mom admitted that perhaps those apples would be fed to the birds. Right. They were still laying on the counter two weeks later when my trip came to a close. I bet those apples are still sitting on her counter top. Or worse, she actually ate them!

Guess that's par for the corese for a fruit-lover. (Just kidding, Mom, you know I love you.) •

© 2007 Chris Dunmire www.chrisdunmire.com. All rights reserved.